Don’t ever think about publishing a story you have started writing without editing. Here is why.
In Trimester 1. I was told to write a Narrative Story. We had 3-4 weeks to write it. Every time one of my classmates said they finished, my teacher Mrs.Davy would always say, “Go back and edit or read it over again.” The reason why she always tells us to go back and edit and read it over again, is so we can correct the mistakes that we wrote, or we would probably like to change it.
My story was about a girl named Kayla that was pretty week when it comes to math. One day she had a test but she did not understand a single thing on it. Read the story below to find out more!
The Graded Test
“BEEP BEEP BEEP.” The alarm went on and woke up Kayla for her 5:50 am routine for school.
She slowly shut the alarm off, then her mom said. “Kayla and Isaac, come downstairs for breakfast.
“What’s for breakfast? asked Kayla.
“Pancakes with yummy syrup,your favorite!” replied mom.
Kayla and her brother both jumped in excitement and went downstairs.
The kids munched on their food, then…..Kayla accidently dropped syrup on her clothes! She took a towel from the kitchen but it made it even worse! So she decided to finish eating then she went back upstairs and wore her uniform so that her mom would not notice. Once Isaac finished he did the same thing she did, except he did not drop on himself.
“Don’t forget about your test sweetie!” yelled mom from downstairs.
“Ohhhh noo,….” whispered Kayla as she slapped her cheeks. She did not practice! Mom wished Kayla best of luck as the two went into their bus. After the bus driver picked up Kayla and Isaac’s bus mates, Tara, Amy, Ella, Max, Jordan and Raven, the bus was on its way to school. Minutes later they arrived at school. Their teacher Mrs.Smith went outside and picked up her class then walked them upstairs. She took attendance and passed out the test worksheets.
Once Mrs.Smith started the timer Kayla slowly picked up her pencil and started. The first question was…. “What is seven minus two?”
Kayla did not remember her subtraction to ten, but atleast she tried.
She had a conversation going on in her head, “seven minus two is ummmm…..seven five three eight. I GOT IT! THE ANSWER IS EIGHT!!!” she quickly wrote down her answer, then continued on with the test with the same mistakes. “DONE!!!!” she screamed. She handed the paper to Mrs.Smith then she was told to read a book afterwards. Kayla hated reading touns and touns. So she got a random book and acted like she reading it. “Bla bla bla, bla bla bla, doo doo doo, la la la. She kept repeating the same thing again and again on each page. Suddenly Mrs.Smith’s timer rang and the class headed back home. Well today was only a one hour day because it was Test Day. She picked up Isaac from his class and they went into the bus, and on their way home, Kayla was scared and frightened because she did not want her mom to see the results of her test. As she arrived home, a couple hours later mom got a message on her email about the scores of the test. “KAYLA!!!! COME HERE NOW!” screamed mom, as angry as a bull chasing a red ball. Her mom asked her if she was guessing on her questions and she said that she was, because she did not know what the answers were. Once mom understood she quickly called Mrs.Smith and asked her if she knew any tutor that can help Kayla. “I HEARD MY DAUGHTER GOT A BAD GRADE!” yelled mom.
“Well it’s not that bad.” replied the teacher.
“OH, SO YOU SAY AN ( F ) IS NOT BAD GRADE? HUH??!” screamed mom. Kayla’s mom automatically hung up.
“Can’t you just get a tutor mom?” asked Isaac.
“PERFECT! , But who, how?”
Isaac’s shoulders went up and down, “I don’t know.”
Soon his mom started searching up tutors for Kayla.
A Tutor or What?
“MOM, SCROLL UP,I SEE A TUTOR!!!” yelled Isaac.
“OOOOOOH,I SEE IT TOO! Aliya Maelen it is!” said mom.
“ Hold on, scroll down just a little more.” replied Isaac.
“Ohh ,boiiiii….its way to expensive. whispered mom.
She went ahead and called Mrs.Smith one more time and asked her about some suggestions.
Mom apologised and said“ Hey,sorry about earlier Smith.”
“Yea,yea, forget about it,so any problems you need me to solve?” asked Mrs.Smith.
“Actually,One thing I think you would be a pro at it.” said mom.
“Sure,go ahead.”replied Mrs.Smith.
Kayla’s mom asked Mrs.Smith if she new any suggestions about how we can make Kayla understand what was on the test. The teacher did have one idea which was to have a tutor, her mom asked the teacher if she knew anyone that can tutor her. Mrs.Smith promised her that she will try to find a tutor to teach Kayla. A while later the call ended, and mom called the kids down for lunch. This time Kayla did not drop on herself. Moments later……Mrs.Smith called and informed Kayla’s mom about the tutor. Her name was Annie Georgia, coming tomorrow. Mom went to school as Mrs.Smith gave her a paper to fill out and give to the tutor so she can make sure she was coming. Just then mom finished signing the sheet. In the meantime she told Kayla to actually read a book so her brain can start working.
The next day after breakfast Annie Georgia came to tutor Kayla. She started off teaching her different ways to do subtraction and she gave her an extra sheet of scrap paper so she could answer the questions that the tutor asked her to fill out. Then she downloaded an app that can help her and guide her to learn more subtraction in easier ways.
Meanwhile Kayla’s mom got a copy from Mrs Smith on the test and asked Kayla to fill it out. She spent time studying in her room finally she filled out the last question and turned it in the next day to Mrs Smith. Once the teacher graded it she was amazed on how Kayla improved on subtraction.
Meanwhile Mrs. Smith emailed Kayla’s mom about the grade. She was so surprised that she showed Kayla and got her out to get a special treat from any sweet shop at the mall. At last Kayla’s mom gave her a reminder to focus and concentrate on what the teacher is teaching.
I think this is one of my best work because it hooks the reader at the beginning meaning, It would encourage them to read more. And in my story, I did not repeat the same words again and again. I edited tons of sentences and words.
Comment on my blog, and tell me improvements, what you did not understand or the things you liked about it, and why.